RSS
Close

24-5-19

Saw the Doc on Tuesday. It was a physical visit this time. We didn’t talk about my mental health, which has been fine for the past 2 weeks. I had a personal problem physically, a bit sensitive. I was embarrassed, it’s a problem that has been affecting me for literally years. The Doc was great, it was just like talking about something mundane, like an everyday thing. She listened, gave great advice, I felt relieved to finally tell her about it, I ended up feeling at ease talking to her about my problem. Which is no surprise, considering she’s the best Doctor I’ve ever seen. She gave me a cream to use, which seems to be working so far, I can only use it for 7 days though. So she told me to be prepared, she’s probably going to have to examine me next time I see her, which made me feel worried at first. But I’ve been thinking the past few days, I’m not going to feel embarrassed next time I see her, why should I, as I say she is the best Doctor I’ve seen, I feel at ease talking to her about anything, I’ve told her my innermost thoughts and feelings, so why should I feel embarrassed about a physical problem. it’s nothing that she hasn’t seen or heard about before, I really shouldn’t feel ashamed in front of her, so I’m not going to, as hard as that is for me, as I’ve always been an extremely shy person. But I’m not going to feel embarrassed next time, I’m just going to talk openly with her.

That’s about it really, nothing much happening lately. As I say, my moods have been pretty good the past couple of weeks, no serious thoughts about self harming, just the odd passing thought. I’m enjoying the nice walks around nature, I’m out every day except Sunday for around 2 hours a day, it’s really good to get around nature for a while, it calms me.