So I awoke yesterday morning feeling a bit better than the day before, thankfully. The depression had lifted somewhat. I still didn’t feel “right”, but I did feel better than the day before. I was really looking forward to seeing the Doc. As I said I wanted to wait until I saw her before I did anything about the self harming thoughts. And it was worth the wait because she made me feel much better. I had just an awesome chat with her, told her how I was feeling, the suicide thoughts a week and a half ago, the depression and self harm thoughts on the 24th, it was such a relief to just get it out of my system and tell someone, and she is the only one I can tell. So it was a big relief. At the end of the appointment she gave me a lovely hug, made me feel good, it was such a lift, just knowing she’s there is comforting. If you could bottle the support and care she gives and her personality and sell it, you’d be a billionaire. I see her again in 2 weeks.
Today I’m feeling good, had quite a pleasant and relaxing day. I did have to be a little careful yesterday afternoon and evening, I was in such a good mood after seeing the Doc, that I had to be a bit careful I didn’t get too high, because if I do that I always get a crash afterwards, but I think I handled it okay.