Had an eventful day. Woke up depressed, so I thought to myself “I’m self harming today”. Saw my Dr. at 9.50am and had a lovely chat with her, I told her that I was probably going to self harm today, she that it made her feel upset that I was going to self harm, which inside of me made me feel good that she said that, it’s nice to have at least one person who cares enough to feel upset when I say I’m going to self harm, she’s an extremely caring person. So I got home, had some food, then I self harmed at 11.20am or so. Some pretty good cuts, I done some smaller cuts but quite a few of them, I haven’t used that method for quite some time. My depression was about a level 6 so I didn’t have to do some huge cut to get a buzz from it. I got a fair amount of blood from them. I enjoyed it, it made me feel good, and most importantly it lifted my depression. I’ve felt very relaxed this afternoon, just nice and chilled out, some nice stinging from the cuts, which is always nice. So that’s about it for today.

About Höst

A blog about various things - music, mental health, nature, my very mundane life and various thoughts.

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